Heart Searching

Two questions:
1.) Do you struggle with a consistent feeling of condemnation when you come before God?
2.)Are you obeying God? 


Romans 8:1 says this: "There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit." 


The devil will come to us constantly, trying to make us feel condemned and separated by God. It's a feeling I've so often battled with. And yet, we have the ability to fight his evil scheme against our heart by the power of the Sword of God's Word. Does this verse bring freedom to you? If not, perhaps it's because there is an area of your life where you HAVE chosen deliberately to serve your flesh rather than the Spirit of God speaking to you. 


I know, because I have been there. 


Yesterday I did something that God has been patiently prompting me to do for years—yes, years. I don't know why He has been so kind and forbearing with me on this issue. I don't know how He's continued to love me and teach me and bless me in the midst of my weakness and fear and--let's face it, DISOBEDIENCE. I told myself this was a "struggle" in my life. Oh, how freely we use that term to pacify our conscience. "struggle" usually means "iniquity." 


God brought me to a point of desperation yesterday and I surrendered. What He asked me to do was perhaps the hardest thing I have EVER done. Hard, humiliating, beating to a bloody pulp my coddled flesh.
It hurt something like crucifixion must hurt. 
Confession. 
Humiliation. 
Accountability.


 But then there was freedom! Freedom...delight... tears in my eyes...and the longing, even, to do it all over again so I could experience the joy that was birthed by those few moments of painful surrender. How often, in the past ten years, did He want to gather me like a mother hen gathers her chicks under her wings-- but I would not (Luke 10:34)? I grieve that. I'm ashamed of it. But oh, the freedom that His forgiveness brings, the joy His pardon washes over me...! 


I can read this verse without a nagging doubt in my mind, now. When that vague feeling settles on my mind that perhaps God is displeased with me, perhaps I'm not worthy to come before Him, perhaps I've sinned in some undefinable way, I can open to this verse, search my heart, and with a clear and authoritative confidence tell the devil to flee. 
I am NOT a slave to the flesh, by the grace of God!
I am a slave to the God Who loves me and gave His life for me! 
Therefore, no condemnation can touch me; it's like water dripping off a duck's back. :) 


Glorious truth!!


Jesus Christ, You are a loving, merciful God-- I am in awe of You. I love You so much. 
I'm Yours. 
YOURS! 
100%.